My husband sent me a message today saying that for the first time in his life, he felt like killing himself. He’s nearly 60. I have never felt like killing myself . Ever. But perhaps one day , there will be a time when it just all feels like too much effort.
I work with people who cope with thoughts like this on a daily basis. Imagine thinking about wanting to die at least once a day?
Anyway, some TLC is needed for my OH, he’s facing his 60th , he has to commute at least 3 hours every day & he hates his job. He said today , that he thought he was a man who could pretty much deal with anything and just get on with life. He sounded beaten. Addiction, debt, old shame and trauma, grief & low self esteem , job dissatisfaction , separation , loss of youth , must contribute to most peoples’ lives in some way , tainting our ability to grow and experience joy. But when these sorts of issues come tumbling out the crisp November sky it can floor even the hardest Scotsman. I wanted to tell him that I have booked a surprise trip to Prague for his birthday in February , I knew this would cheer him up , but I so want to keep it till the last minute for full effect, so I kept my tongue. But , living in the now. I said to him, we have a house, warm bed, we can credit card some presents , it’s not the end of the world.